This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize