Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
The struggles of a small town man whore
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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