you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
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She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
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Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
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