If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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