sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Randomize