Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
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