im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're a waste of cheezeits
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize