Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
he shaved USA in his pubs
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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