I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
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I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
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in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
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