I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
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