C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Randomize