You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
