and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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