Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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