who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize