I never want to see another naked old woman again.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize