i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize