It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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