dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
she woke up with a sticky ear
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
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I forgot how hot balto sounded
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
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