we have pet lesbian snakes
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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