i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize