a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
My first STD was from a foam party
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
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