Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
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