Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
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