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  • Submitted by marsho on Jul 14, 10 at 8:53pm

    In Soviet Russia we shove potatoes sideways up firsty's ass. Then we shove vodka in there. Finally, we take aim with our AKs.

    • 54 52
      Submitted by firsty on Jul 14, 10 at 9:58pm

      :O Firsty wants to go to Soviet Russia now!! :D

  • Submitted by necrocat on Jul 14, 10 at 6:07pm

    Firsty, please stop. It isn't funny anymore.

    • 47 63
      Submitted by firsty on Jul 14, 10 at 6:17pm

      The length of time that Firsty exists is proportional to how funny he is.\n\nFirsty!

      • 44 38
        Submitted by dassjennir on Jul 14, 10 at 7:06pm

        Yes the longer he exists the less funny he becomes

        • 41 49
          Submitted by firsty on Jul 14, 10 at 8:26pm

          You obviously have no idea what "proportional" means..

          • 32 58
            Submitted by arthurlux on Jul 14, 10 at 9:31pm

            You're assuming it's directly proportional, when in fact it is inversely proportional. Both are forms of proportional. I think /you're/ the one who doesn't know what it means.

            • 51 51
              Submitted by dassjennir on Jul 14, 10 at 9:35pm

              Thank you Arthur that's exactly what I was about to say

            • 48 47
              Submitted by firsty on Jul 14, 10 at 9:47pm

              *sigh* I can't believe I have to explain this. "Proportional" implies that one variable increase when the other variable increases, and vice-versa. "Directly proportional" implies that there is a a linear relationship between the two variables. "Directly proportional" is the opposite of "indirectly proportional", not "inversely proportional". Therefore, "proportional" cannot mean "inversely proportional". arthurlux and dassjennir

            • 61 55
              Submitted by firsty on Jul 14, 10 at 10:05pm

              arthurlux and dassjennir just got Firstied!

            • 38 49
              Submitted by dassjennir on Jul 14, 10 at 10:13pm

              Indirectly proportional=inversely proportional \nhttp://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_is_indirectly_proportional\nDirect quote: "indirectly proportional" appears to be interchangeable with "inversely proportional." \nthank you for proving my point. I rest my case

            • 47 45
              Submitted by firsty on Jul 14, 10 at 10:32pm

              Ah yes, because people posting answers on "wiki answers" saying "this appears to be right.." are so reliable, right?

            • 35 54
              Submitted by dassjennir on Jul 14, 10 at 10:40pm

              eh, whatever this already went too far. I had nothing better to do atm. I might never visit this site ever again after all this troll business

            • 33 56
              Submitted by firsty on Jul 14, 10 at 10:42pm

              Firstyyy! :D

  • 77 57
    Submitted by enjoy420 on Jul 14, 10 at 10:30pm

    Pussy take a handfull or a oxycotin 80

  • 84 89
    Submitted by Anonymous12345 on Jul 14, 10 at 9:51pm

    maybe you should use the vicodin for what it is actually prescribed for and not abuse it like the countless people that do

  • 61 45
    Submitted by caligurl4real on Jul 14, 10 at 8:38pm

    Ugh I feel for you!!!!

  • 66 58
    Submitted by demented on Jul 14, 10 at 7:42pm

    I probably know this person and They probably going going to ocmd

  • 64 57
    Submitted by godlessBJ on Jul 14, 10 at 6:10pm

    I feel your pain... When family vacations are concerned, sobriety isn't really an option.

  • 64 58
    Submitted by mhg89 on Jul 14, 10 at 10:13pm

    It's hilarious how annoyed people get by the 'first' comments.

  • 60 65
    Submitted by Nasty on Jul 14, 10 at 8:38pm

    In Soviet Russia, thirsty makes you pretzels.

  • 56 57
    Submitted by fearnaught44 on Jul 14, 10 at 6:12pm

    I feel your pain. I just took a family trip to visit my half senile granny and she lives in a DRY county!!! Torture. Lol

  • 67 80
    Submitted by evolwayz on Jul 14, 10 at 10:29pm

    Wow, 3 whole vicodins?? Wish i was back to that low of tolerance....I'd have to shoot heroin if i wanted to numb myself out from my family

  • 52 53
    Submitted by itouchgnomes on Jul 15, 10 at 12:50am

    snort oxys pussy

  • 55 59
    Submitted by hourglassss on Jul 14, 10 at 7:21pm

    i feel ya. i told my parents when i was 12 that i wouldn't go on any more family vacas. somehow, that hasn't stopped them on dragging me on countless miserable trips.

  • 45 40
    Submitted by FirstydieinaFire on Jul 16, 10 at 2:44am

    I'm anti-firsty and also considering deleting this app BECAUSE of firsty. firsty = Allen001 = ruining my daily laugh and making me want to hit someone.

  • 63 78
    Submitted by antifirsty on Jul 15, 10 at 1:11am

    To all who is tired of firsty i am here the antifirsty. I will rid the site of firsty for good

  • 49 50
    Submitted by prettylitlpunk on Jul 14, 10 at 9:37pm

    What's second necrocat?

  • 52 59
    Submitted by NationOfThizzlam on Jul 15, 10 at 12:05am

    have fun trying to shit..

  • 48 54
    Submitted by schreiX19 on Jul 14, 10 at 10:22pm

    Sounds like me every weekend with my family.

  • 49 60
    Submitted by loybear on Jul 15, 10 at 2:44am

    sounds like my family lol

  • 43 54
    Submitted by KesJaye on Jul 17, 10 at 3:11am

    Firsty when you use them thar book smarts of yours some folk can't keep up with you. Keep it on the slow and zombie brains level of understanding please? Firsty for Predident!

  • 40 50
    Submitted by Dingus on Jul 14, 10 at 8:48pm

    Ya dingus!!

  • 43 64
    Submitted by TheAwfulWaffle on Jul 15, 10 at 1:56am

    Sorry mate, that sucks. If you had prepared like me you wou

  • 53 88
    Submitted by juicy_cooter on Jul 14, 10 at 9:11pm

    God bless firsty!

    • 49 58
      Submitted by firsty on Jul 14, 10 at 9:56pm

      thanks, juicy! :D

    • 36 56
      Submitted by mhg89 on Jul 14, 10 at 10:09pm

      Indeed!

  • 37 58
    Submitted by livetodisco on Jul 15, 10 at 6:19am

    I can't believe you are having a serious battle over the term proportional.

  • 47 79
    Submitted by niceman on Jul 14, 10 at 10:39pm

    Just fucking kill them and escape to Algeria, you fucking idiot

  • 39 64
    Submitted by want_some94 on Jul 15, 10 at 1:23am

    HOLY SHIT!!!!