garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
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