Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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