i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
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MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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