Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
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