im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
he just fucked me for my cheese..
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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