absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize