he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
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