closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize