Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
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We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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