Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
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