I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize