How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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