Pappa wants mamma naked
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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