shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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