all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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