Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize