You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
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I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
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but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
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