Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize