It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
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