You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
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