I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
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