So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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