guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
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