i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
PANTIES FOUND
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize