well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize