I didn't shave. On purpose
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
i think my mom watched the whole time
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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